Vegans Are Wrong

Before we begin to discuss one of the most polarizing food topics we must acknowledge that becoming vegan or at least plant-based is incredibly beneficial for that person, the environment, and of course the mistreated animals. Despite the strong moral obligation, health benefits, and positive environmental impact people still think that going vegan is a silly idea. There are three very powerful reasons people are not becoming vegan. First, eating a high meat-protein-based diet is a part of Western culture. We were raised on these diets and they have become part of our identity. Second, the most popular argument for eating meat is that meat is delicious with just salt and pepper. Lastly, meat is a cheap and convenient way to fill the stomachs of those who cannot afford the accumulated price of an organic plant-based diet. For those who fall into the first two categories, the vegan mindset and attitude are failing to persuade people to change. For those who fall into the third category, we need to change the entire market demand in order to get them affordable plant-based foods. Obviously, this will require a mass-market transformation which is going to take a lot of time.

 

Okay, but why are “vegans wrong?”

The failure of veganism lies in the pompous and righteous vegan attitude as well as the demonization of meat-eaters. The first thing vegans did is try to produce a bunch of plant-based B.S. that revolves around mimicking animal products. By far the worst strategy for a change I’ve ever seen and most likely the biggest reason veganism has failed. Why would you try and mimic gray and brown when you have the entire rainbow at your fingertips. Why would you try to mimic the five flavors of dairy, chicken, bacon, beef, and game when you have limitless combinations in your arsenal. Vegans are a group of people that have the entire { metaphorical} alphabet to use and have decided to stick with ABCD and E. It’s not stupidity, and it certainly is not ignorance, it is pathetic pandering. Rather than show people these disgusting and over-processed versions of “meat” show them the colors, flavors, and textures that animals can’t give you. Why the hell would someone want to become vegan for your tofu bacon when they can experience the time-stopping flavor of real bacon? Stop trying to make vegetables into the meat and start making them as they were intended… Unlimited flavors that sore beyond meat’s wildest dreams. 

 

Celebrating the diversity of plants is a much better way to change a society’s obsession with boring and repetitive meat-based meals rather than ironically telling them that they are wrong and then eating a fake version of their meal. If we’re going, to be honest with each other the only reason the meat industry is thriving is because of great marketing. Demonizing the meat industry is just pissing meat-eaters off and/or making them feel bad so they stress eat meat or eat it out of spite. If you want to start a revolution you don’t scare people, you promote positivity. Rather than grab a meat-eater by the collar and shove awful facts about the meat industry down their throats, ignore their diet and celebrate yours. People love looking at food and they love vibrant colors. The more you promote different plants, the more people will start eating them. Let me give you a fantastic personal example. A friend of mine hates the taste of vegetables and only eats meat and Oreos. One day I showed him a picture of a smoothie that I drink in the mornings and he thought it looked delicious. So I told him how to make his own version with just a little bit of veggies to start. The smoothie had, a lot of fruit, yogurt with a little spinach, kale, ginger, and turmeric. Since he started drinking smoothies he has added more greens and actually craves them in the mornings. This is an overly dramatic example of a person with a hopeless diet, but I gave him the first step and soon his body will take over by craving the very things he claims to hate. The transition may be slow, but it is still progress and that’s better than if I shoved spinach down his throat and he despised green shit for the rest of his life. 

 

Thousands of people simply making more salads and being excited about plants is a much more powerful movement than adding 50 die-hard members to your cult of veganists. Be proud to be vegan and tell people about it, but stop expecting them to turn vegan overnight as you did. Stop fear-mongering and shoving processing plant propaganda down people’s throats and start showing off your colorful plates and constantly ready beach bods bruh! Continue to talk about your endless energy and maybe even make your friends a salad or smoothie that has a bit of naughty dairy in them. You can also have people over for dinner and make plates of food that meat cannot compare to. If you can’t cook then maybe just stay out of it completely because your shitty vegan food is not going to convince anybody to change.

 

Listen, I get it. The idea of faking meat comes from good intentions, but it is not working. You are not reinventing your diet you are trying to substitute and replace your comfort foods with these science projects and it is far too limiting as well as it is a little hypocritical. I eat what I would consider a plant-based diet. What this means is that I am about 90% vegan on a daily basis. The main reason I will not go full vegan is that I want all of the tools in my culinary tool belt. I don’t see meat as a bad thing because it is not a bad thing. The overconsumption of meat is what is bad and that is why animals are forced to feedlots. When I crave meat I make sure it is ethically raised, grass-fed and comes from a farm or ranch that cares about the animals. Full disclosure, I buy meat this way because I enjoy the difference in the quality and flavors, the moral implications are just a bonus. Also, I am mainly plant-based for health and productivity reasons so when I choose to eat meat, it has to be worth it! I want the best of the best when I eat animal products because I know I am going to feel groggy and bloated for the rest of the day. Common sense and elementary knowledge of nutrition and biology tell us that eating more plants and less meat is the healthiest choice you can make for longer and more fulfilling life.